Costa Coffee – London N8

Unfortunately, to my mind, Costa have the best coffee but the worst everything else. The food is barely edible (except the caramel square of which I am especially fond and of which I have to restrict my intake to avoid what would be dramatic reductions in the gains made from running thirty miles a week; one day though, I’m going to eat six at once), the interiors design in dingy and depressing, and the staff are rude and incompetent.


It’s not like I expect anything special from the staff; they’re doing what is basically a menial job for low pay. Why would you be happy with that? But there’s no need to be a miserable shitbite either.

I used to work in a cafe (back in the days before Starbucks and the other chains hit these shores), and although I was never a particularly good waiter I tried to smile and pass on a little joy and I took  pride in turning out a good foam. Kids today, well, sheesh! They’ll ask if you want a muffin, or want chocolate on top of your cap; beyond that you’re just blocking the view.

They also have some rather unsettling photos on the walls. These are mostly scenes of  generic Mediterranean streets, squares, cafes etc. designed obviously to make grumpy Londoners struggling through the rain and misery of a British winter ( or summer for that matter), feel a little more cosmopolitan and sophisticated. But there’s a sinister undertone, which may or may not be intentional. Take this one as an example:

a young couple taking a pleasant stroll though a Tuscan market? Look again: firstly, he is clearly way older than her. Nothing wrong with that per se, but add to that the manner in which he is leading her, virtually shoving her along in a choke hold; the tension you can see in her shoulders, recoiling at his touch, and note also his concealed left hand? What’s he holding? A knife? A gun? His penis? The whole things looks a little rapey. Still, good coffee is good coffee.

  1. paul dodd says:

    As a fellow employee of johnstones just desserts east kilbride Scotland I do believe when you say foods un edible I do agree as I seen things for 2 and a half year that you wouldn’t eat to be honest so unhygienic place I have ever worked that do they caramel squares you talk about!. And unhygienic things like bugs creepy crawlies running about production lines while lines in progress and things lying in big metal containers that been there for about year and a half food really disgusting actually glad I resigned from my position up there only if you know half of if you probably boycott costa altogether to be honest.

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